Questions & Answers

As you get your networking and advertising items ready to distribute, you’ll likely have lots of questions. Below, you’ll find the most frequently-asked questions adoptive families have had about networking and advertising.

We aren’t on Facebook and prefer not to be since it is really just a time waster. Do we have to be on Facebook to adopt?

Many people still consider Facebook a place where people waste time by posting a photo of their dinner, announce their plans (or lack thereof) and try to connect with old friends. Guess what? All of these activities are most definitely not time wasters when it comes to adoption! Post a photo of your profile, announce your adoption search, and connect with everyone you may know. For most people, Facebook (and all social media) is what you make it. You can waste time, or you can be purposeful in the contacts you make and the things you post. No, you don’t have to be on Facebook to adopt, but when it is working for so many families, why wouldn’t you do it?

We are worried about the security aspect of being on Facebook. Will people find out all our personal information like last names, addresses, birth dates and more?

People will find what you share. If you are concerned about those things, don’t share them. The reality is that your address, birth date and more likely is online in some other listing that is public record. Just be mindful about normal security decisions, for instance don’t post when you are leaving for a two week vacation. This is a big flag for any local ‘friends’ that your house is vacant. Similarly, turn off the automatic location option so your posts aren’t automatically flagged with the city you are posting from. Remember, you can always maintain strict privacy settings on Facebook if you desire.

We don’t really want to tell anybody about our adoption until we bring our baby home. How can we network so nobody knows?

There are many ways you can do it, although it may cost more and be less successful because you don’t have the power of third-party endorsement. For instance, you can deliver your profiles to all the OB physicians in town, but it isn’t the same as one of their patients giving it to them and saying “This is my sister and her husband and they are searching for a woman who may want to consider them as adoptive parents.” This is not to say it can’t work, but it just will take more time, effort, and possibly money on your part.

We are tired of searching and want to consider other options. What ideas do you have?

Consider watching the waiting children list at AdoptUSKids. This lists children eligible for adoption across the country. There are many sibling groups and younger children, although many of them have medical special needs.

It is not uncommon for families to discover through the adoption process that they are eager to be parents and not necessarily only to a newborn. Our hearts sometimes grow while waiting and we realize that we have enough love and blessing for the child (or children!) that need us, more than waiting for a child to bring love and blessing to us. This is something I have seen many times.